Monthly Archives: November 2014

People Aren’t Ducks

Ducks in a RowAs I was working with a client the other day, I could tell she was just not into it.  I asked what was wrong and she answered that her team was “just not lining up.”  I immediately thought of these ducks I took a picture of on vacation.  Why?  I don’t know, but I went with it.

“Like ducks,” I said.  “You want them in a row?”  “YES,” she enthusiastically replied.  I took a deep breathe before I answered because I knew she wasn’t going to like what I had to say.  “People aren’t ducks.”

We went on to have a great discussion about controlling people.  In a business setting, as people get higher up the corporate food chain, they are asked to manage people and they assume that means that you tell them what to do.  That only works in the military and it works because people know that’s what they signed up for.

My client fired back that on this particular day, she was irritated because she had to take minutes at her team meeting.  She asked for volunteers and no one wanted to do it.  “So I did it to be nice,” she said.  “And now you are totally pissed at them,” I said.  “How nice is that?”

When people don’t do what we want them to do, our tendency is to fall back on two easy roles.  The martyr or the dictator.  The martyr says fine, I’ll do it myself and I will never ask for any help ever again.  The dictator over time gets so angry that they start living the “it’s my way or the highway” mantra.  Neither makes a good boss or a good leader.

My client admitted that she usually went to the martyr role, but wasn’t sure what else to do.  We brainstormed for a few minutes and came up with the easy solution of rotating the minute meeting task in her group.  There are six people, so now everyone one on her team gets to be miserable for two meetings a year when they have to do the minutes.  (Seriously, no one likes that job.  I think in all my years working, I met one person who actually liked taking minutes.)  Now instead of being mad at her team for not being the perfect little group, she now has a solution to present to the group.  Leaders present solutions and they find ways to work with the dynamics of the team they have, not force them into a perfect little line.

With Thanksgiving around the corner, you might find yourself immersed in the most difficult team setting of all, your family.  Someone might forget that side dish they promised to bring.  Uncle Pat will tell you you’re carving the turkey wrong.  People will do things you don’t want them to do.  People will say things that push all your buttons.  It all comes down to how you will react.

Remember what thanksgiving is about.  Gratitude.  Be grateful for your “team” and don’t treat them like ducks or even worse turkeys.  HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!


Chakra Playlist

Chakra PlaylistWhen I worked for a major corporation my colleagues and I would lament over the flavor of the month.  The flavor of the month was the new, hip management business system that our bosses would want us to learn and implement.  We were told that this new system would change everything. We’d be excited for a day.  Engaged for a few more.  Come the following Monday, we’d have forgotten all about it.  But that wasn’t the case for all the management tools.  The goods ones stick and are still in practice today.


I feel the same goes for spiritual tools as well.  For centuries people have been teaching about the chakras – seven energy centers in the body that according to Hindu teaching, when in balance, produce health and wellbeing from the inside out.


My first study of the chakras was via Sonia Choquette’s book True Balance.  Each chapter addresses a specific chakra.  First you learn about the chakra, what it represents, and how to tell if that particular chakra is in or out of balance.  This book is filled with exercises and quizzes which I dove into.  It even led me to try chakra attunement, which is a basically seven different mantras/notes that are sung.  The vibrational energy of the note helps balance the chakra and I tell you when I do it, I feel great.


Now I know some of you out there are bit skeptical on things like chakras.  Yes you, my corporate crusaders who just learned a new flavor of month, I’m talking to you.  So how about I ease you into chakras with my very own SOUL Chakra playlist.


As each song plays, think about the place in the body where the chakra is located.  Relax.  Let the music open your mind to new things.  Perhaps even a deeper study of chakras.